let’s talk about sex baby…

Anyone remember that song?  “Salt ‘n’ Peppa”, I believe.

So I am now home and solved the dinner dilemma–since I couldn’t decide and don’t really feel like going to the store, I checked my fridge and have some goat cheese, asiago, parmiagano reggiano(sp?), monterey jack, and brie.  I’m thinking I’m going to use a LITTLE bit of the reggiano, and disclude any soy sauce to bring down the saltiness.  Hopefully it will turn out okay!!

Anyway, sex has been on my mind all day my friends.  In two capacities–one being the act of sex because Mr. Martini has come back into my life and turns me on more than any man has in the recent past, and two, the concept of sex (as in gender) because I read a very sexist and offensive weblog on here yesterday.  So I would like to vent a little bit about both topics.  Blog, if you will. :)

On sex–I thought about whether or not it was cool to write about it for the whole world to potentially see, as I am quite a lady in the sense that I adhere to general etiquette rather strictly (sometimes to my detriment ie. causing me to be called “snobby” or “prissy”) and it is obviously somewhat inappropriate in our society to discuss sex openly.  That said, I was recently discussing Tony Blair’s wife with a friend and how the British people have not taken kindly to her being so open in her sexuality, and I couldn’t help but think that if this were a MAN, it would not be looked upon the same way.  So, although I shall still adhere to my mother’s wishes of being the epitome of a lady in my public life, I’m going to allow myself to vent about sex on here because I can’t think of any reason why the hell not. (And I’m going to pray my mother or friends never stumble upon this weblog!)

The stigma of speaking openly about making love in our society is especially bothersome to me because it’s something I very much love, both poetically and literally.  That is, I am a very sexual person and enjoy it immensely, but in addition to that, I have a genuine intellectual interest in sex as a biological phenomenon as well as the psychological/sociological aspects of sex.

Intellectuality aside, though, I LOVE sex; I think that is actually a primary reason for my academic interest in it.  Sadly, though, as I have touched upon before, I am not into the idea of monogamy right now–it just doesn’t suit my worldview, my way of life, or my feelings on relationships.  So, doing the math, what does that mean my friends?  No sex for Charlee.

Yeah, it’s a pretty serious bummer, but in some aspects I think it’s good–most of the time I think of myself as being somewhat of a Morrissey-inspired person, in the sense that I don’t see myself as celibate but to not have all relationships based in physicality is an enlightening and helpful experience in terms of self-awareness and growth.  (Btw, I LOVE Morrissey so very much–and I don’t particularly care if that’s cliché!)

It is very funny to me how my generation views sex though.  As in, I don’t think my mother could say that when she was my age, she had several friends who currently have (or who have had in the past) a regular “booty call”.  But, particularly for very driven young people (ie. my college friends), there are only so many hours in the day and I think to have a casual sexual relationship with someone is something that has evolved out of necessity for many young people.

Anyway–circumstances being what they are in that I have not gotten busy with a man in a while, Mr. Martini has been turning me on big time.  I mean, I’m incredibly turned on by him in general (as if you couldn’t tell), but him popping up out of nowhere and being his amazingly adorable self really isn’t helping my desire to avoid sexual contact with him.

The reason why this has been on my mind all day?  Last night, we had a few drinks back at the hotel after dinner, and it started to get rather late, causing him to suggest I stay.  It was really the most prudent choice and it was terribly cold and I was rather drunk, so I said that would be okay.  I stayed in a separate bedroom, but was still left wondering if something could or should have happened.

It’s just so odd because I don’t see us being together–he’s so all over the place, and I’m so right here (for now) and there is no sense in trying to commit to someone you can’t see in person on a regular basis.  That said, I really do love him and know he loves me, and isn’t that all that is supposed to matter?

I don’t know–what I DO know is that I need a break from all the Mr. Martini business, so a girlfriend and I are going to happy hour tonight and then out.  It should be a fun night!

Hope everyone else has a fabulous night also!

xx Charlee


Filed under men, personal, ruminations, sex

3 responses to “let’s talk about sex baby…

  1. The British pride themselves culturally on reserve, stiff upper lip and all, as an element of their character, except when Kate Winslet (who is indeed brilliant) receives Golden Globe statues. So while I think your gender point has validity to it, I would speculate that more waves would be created in the UK than stateside over the same issue.

    Now I really have to get back to my term paper, thanks for the diversion!

  2. Charlee

    You are most welcome for the diversion! I am glad I could return the favour :)

    And you’re 100% correct–the tendency of the Brits to be underwhelmed and reserved definitely contributed to the issue and I actually started to write about it but then realised I have to edit myself SOMEWHERE since I’m a bit long-winded and it was somewhat irrelevant.

    Perhaps it wasn’t the best example, but it was what came to mind at the moment–I do attribute some of the controversy to their culture but I also think if it were a man, it would not have been AS controversial.

    I think you’re right in that we’re a bit more chill and it would not have been such a big deal here–and definitely not in France!

    Enjoy the paper writing!

  3. Pingback: a little lovin’ with your tea? (yup, I kiss and write) « The Coffeehouse Chronicles

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