The Bubble

Did anyone see 30 rock this week?  I absolutely love that program–The Office was really the only television show I was into, and then I realised that not watching Tina Fey’s program when I have an EPIC girl crush on Tina Fey was just odd.   The point is, YOU SHOULD WATCH IT! (Or at least tivo it with sincere intentions.)

I digress.  In this episode Tina (or Liz as I believe she is called on the show) was dating this doctor who thought he was a magnificent cook, a fabulous tennis player, blah blah bnlah blah…well it came to light that he actually sucked at everything.  Everyone was just being nice to him because he’s a sexy docta!

As of late I have been having a bit of an identity crisis and this episode made me wonder if I, too, have been living in a bubble.

This started last weekend.  I had to spend time with Lover’s awful sister.  His whole family is lacking in coolness if you ask me (and just in case you DO read this my dear, please remember that loving someone does not mean loving their family! :) ) but homegirl takes the fucking cake.  She tells these exasperatingly long stories and really just rubs me the wrong way.  Generally, I make a lot of effort to avoid people that don’t please me…but this is one thing I could not get out of.

Every time I said something, it was like she had this whole story about why what I said was wrong, or how I should rethink what I said.  I mean, honestly?  I know I have a big mouth.  I know that may be bothersome at times…but I’m over it.  We all have our idiosyncrasies, and it is what it is.  Why the hell does she even care what I like?   I don’t expect anyone else to agree with me or think in the same manner…and even though I might not like certain things, it doesn’t mean I dislike the PEOPLE associated with them. Everyone is different, bitch! Come off it!

She was just so utterly bothersome, but I think I’ve made my point that we just didn’t get on well.

However, she is a bit tricky, because she succeeded in making me think about some of the things that she said to me, almost a week later–and this is why I avoid people who have studied psychology extensively.  I had a lover who also did, and like homegirl, he used his knowledge mostly for EVIL.

So now I’m wondering if I, too, have lived in a bubble which only includes people who love me…and it’s true, I really hate interacting with people whom I have not endeared myself to in one way or another.

Now I feel that many of my perceptions could just be reflections of people telling me what I want to hear!  What a horrific thought!

I think we all have our own bubbles to some extent, but perhaps some people are more insulated, so to speak, than others.

What do you think?  Do you believe in the idea of ‘The Bubble’ confusing your self-concept?  Do you think YOU live in a bubble?

I’d love to know!

x C


Filed under men, personal, ruminations

9 responses to “The Bubble

  1. Pshaw. Until you’ve lived for a week with a mother in law who talks to you 24/7 in a little girl voice, and a father in law who rocks underwear full time in house, you have to bear with it and take the high road.

    My brother is like that though, long winded explanations for why what you just said is wrong, insecure. He’s kind of a prick like that…long run though, they piss everybody off and pay a social price, so resistance is unnecessary as pointing it out might only shorten their exquisitely long pain cycle.

    I know, mean huh?

  2. Also, everybody nice to me because I am sexy cartoon.

  3. That happens. I mean why not? it’s normal if we surround ourselves with people we like to be with and love us. It’s healthy too. But on your man’s sister, I think it’s entirely different thing. If she only says stuff like that everytime you talk it’s not your problem then, it’s hers. She radiates negativity and you have every reason not to like her.

  4. Jen

    My bee-ef’s brother was like that to me, too. When we were living with him, I thought I’d give him a chance, you know, since it was bee-ef’s brother and all. B.F doesn’t like him, either. But anyway…I read this lovenote of his he left in the bedroom before he moved out (I know…I’m bad, I couldn’t resist though, he was sooo aloof, like me). The note pretty much confessed what I’d known the first few days of being around him. He hated people’s opinions, felt superior to them, and his excuse for being an alcoholic was that in order to deal with people, he’d drink himself into being what he thought was nice, but really turned out to be annoying. But, he’d listen to what I said, the few times I wanted to have a convo w/ him…and his immediate response would be “Not necessarily…” making me not want to even make a peep. (sorry this was waaaay too long and stuff! My point: siblings-of-significant-others suck, plain and simple.)

  5. Charlee

    Michael…I am sorry about your in-laws. That sounds quite unpleasant, although at least they’re amusing, right? And I must say, you’re definitely amongst the sexier cartoons I’ve encountered in my day! ;-)

    Andhari– Yeah, you’re right…everyone surrounds themselves with people whom they enjoy, so the mutual love skews things. And I agree…she does have a problem. I try to like her because I know she probably has some weird reasons for being so unpleasant, but it’s so hard to deal with, you know? But thanks for the validation, it is appreciated! :) xx

    Jen: Thanks for sharing that awesome tale. Very profound illustration of my point! I especially love your usage of phonetics to express your adoration for acronyms. Quite cute. :)

  6. eastkowski

    Yuck. Trying to deal with your SOs family can be so hard. It also stinks that she does use her education for evil. Gotta learn to turn it off! Rule #1 in the mental health field: Do not attempt to counsel your friends or family! Good luck.

    Hahaha I think I’m going to have to ask her if she’s heard of Rule Number One. Love it!
    It is hard though…they are really unpleasant people…even he thinks so. That’s when you know it’s bad!
    Thanks for reading!
    x C

  7. Hi Charlie

    I enjoy your blog. This post captured my attention as I have been accused by a good friend of living in a bubble…… and they’re right! I hadn’t thought about it before, but subconciously I have organised my life to avoid all the stuff that pisses me off…… is this not the act of any rational creature? Some people are more insulated than others….. mainly the ones that need to be. At the risk of sounding like your SIL, you might want to check out the work of Elaine Aron – the highly sensitive person – it rang true for me, but maybe not for you.

    In my experience anyone who studied psychology extensively chose this path because they are riddled with issues – but that doesn’t mean they have resolved them……. some are just dangerous.


    I am glad you enjoy it, thanks! :) I do sort of live in a bubble although I think it’s actually conscious for me, hahaha…I will check out that writer though!!

    Hah I have heard that before about people studying psych–that is somewhat true in my personal experience, but not in my academic experience, perhaps this is because they are able to hide their craziness in the academic environment!! They are tricky, I tell you.

    x C

  8. sorry Charlee – spelt your name wrong in my typing rush –

    No worries!! :)

  9. Pingback: Then what? My boobs are too big? « The Coffeehouse Chronicles

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