Basically, I grew up with five brothers. It was pretty chill, except when I wanted to talk about flowers and princesses. Enter my need for other friends. So, after watching a number of Disney films, I decided that if I was nice enough to animals, they’d start speaking to me and become my friends…
sadly I am still working on this lifelong quest! Apparently creatures are quite shy!
Sometimes my deep and enduring love for animals causes problems.
Like when I spent much of my free time during college collecting mouse traps around my dormitory and befriending the ‘pests’ – my friends quite enjoyed retelling these tales. Once they got over their anger.
Also, LIKE TODAY.
I was at work when suddenly my coworker started screeching as though she’d taken a ninja star to the external jugular. Accordingly, I ignored her. Thus, she got up in my grill and explained that she’d seen a mouse and was pretty much grossly overreacting. That said, I’m not going to lie, I am freakishly afraid of bugs, to the point where I actually moved house after seeing one because I became terrified of the place. So yeah, I’ve got some crazy related to little unwanted houseguests (a term I coined/copyrighted in France because I didn’t know the word for mouse! Terribly cleva, I know!) so I felt her pain.
However, I think mice are adorable and awesome little friends – but homegirl disagreed and wanted to get a mouse trap. SO I offered to go, because I wanted to at the very least find a trap that would keep my new little buddy safe until we were reunited!
This is where things get really sad, so please be prepared with Kleenex…
when I got to the store, things took a very evil turn. THERE WERE NO ‘HAVE A HEART’ TRAPS. At this point, I felt I had a moral obligation to my coworker who was probably freaking out like a madwoman in my absence, and I knew going to another retail location would be unfair to her and her unnecessary anxiety.
SO, I HAD TO BETRAY THE ANIMAL KINGDOM.
Believe me friends, this gave me no joy, and I feel very guilty for this harsh backstabbing of my little mousey friend.
I really feel I had no choice but I would like to request that all who read this purchase the NON-HOMICIDAL traps if you find yourself dealing with some little animals in the future, AS A PERSONAL FAVOUR, SO THE COSMIC BALANCE OF THE UNIVERSE CAN BE RESTORED.
Thanks and have a great day!