Tag Archives: boring

big ups to my rodent friends

Today has been a very tragic day for me.

Basically, I grew up with five brothers.  It was pretty chill, except when I wanted to talk about flowers and princesses.  Enter my need for other friends.  So, after watching a number of Disney films, I decided that if I was nice enough to animals, they’d start speaking to me and become my friends…

sadly I am still working on this lifelong quest!  Apparently creatures are quite shy!

Sometimes my deep and enduring love for animals causes problems.

Like when I spent much of my free time during college collecting mouse traps around my dormitory and befriending the ‘pests’ – my friends quite enjoyed retelling these tales.  Once they got over their anger.

Also, LIKE TODAY.

I was at work when suddenly my coworker started screeching as though she’d taken a ninja star to the external jugular.  Accordingly, I ignored her.  Thus, she got up in my grill and explained that she’d seen a mouse and was pretty much grossly overreacting.  That said, I’m not going to lie, I am freakishly afraid of bugs, to the point where I actually moved house after seeing one because I became terrified of the place.  So yeah, I’ve got some crazy related to little unwanted houseguests (a term I coined/copyrighted in France because I didn’t know the word for mouse!  Terribly cleva, I know!) so I felt her pain.

However, I think mice are adorable and awesome little friends – but homegirl disagreed and wanted to get a mouse trap.  SO I offered to go, because I wanted to at the very least find a trap that would keep my new little buddy safe until we were reunited!

This is where things get really sad, so please be prepared with Kleenex…

when I got to the store, things took a very evil turn.  THERE WERE NO ‘HAVE A HEART’ TRAPS.  At this point, I felt I had a moral obligation to my coworker who was probably freaking out like a madwoman in my absence, and I knew going to another retail location would be unfair to her and her unnecessary anxiety.

SO, I HAD TO BETRAY THE ANIMAL KINGDOM.

Believe me friends, this gave me no joy, and I feel very guilty for this harsh backstabbing of my little mousey friend.

I really feel I had no choice but I would like to request that all who read this purchase the NON-HOMICIDAL traps if you find yourself dealing with some little animals in the future, AS A PERSONAL FAVOUR, SO THE COSMIC BALANCE OF THE UNIVERSE CAN BE RESTORED.

Thanks and have a great day!

x C

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verbatim

Weird shit people have said to me recently.

“It’s not that you’re a bitch…you’re just…overly nonchalant.”


Well, you sure seem to enjoy drinking quite a bit!” (weird attempt at conversing by Marley’s unlikely lover, whom I hardly know and did not wish to talk to)


“You were such a weird child…and then I signed you up to become a cheerleader, because I thought that would make you more normal…(awkward trail off)” — Mother


“You were purposely trying to use words she doesn’t know!” –My brother, in reference to his wife not knowing the word “optimal”


“If you suck, you suck.” (note: this was not meant hypothetically, but said rather cheerfully)


…and people wonder why I tend to make rude facial expressions so often! It’s also hard to properly capture the absurdity of these statements without the applicable tone of voice/being able to see the person saying them, but yeah, what a whack attack, right?

How the fuck do you even reply to these comments?  People are ridiculous.

x C

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rampant materialism (and how to know you’re officially in your twenties)

In the midst of my online shopping frenzy today, it occurred to me that some of my purchases were things I never would have purchased two years ago, or perhaps even last year!  Even my personal style is much different than it was just a short time ago.  This reminded me of a “gosh, we’re old” anecdote:

A few weeks ago, a girlfriend made dinner for a few of our friends and I, and afterward, we were putting away the leftovers when two of my friends remarked on how fabulous a piece of my friend’s Tupperware was. This led my other friend to promptly retort that we “officially know we’re in our twenties.”

It’s true–it makes me feel a little old to be so into dinner parties, decor, and kitchen gadgets, but alas, my life can no longer center around push-up bras and hot lingerie (though they are still a pretty big part of my life, obviously).

Anyway, all the sitting around time I had to deal with today led me to fill the time in one of my most favourite ways–shopping!  Hell yes.  What recession?

This was actually very good for me, because the absence of drinking and cigarettes (I think I would literally sell my soul for one) and food (!!) in my life has left me feeling very under indulged and cranky–not to mention I have been playing shopping nazi with myself for a long time, so I went a bit crazy with the shopping, but it was entirely necessary in my self-centered, overly self-indulgent world.

Yes, it is good to be young and perhaps a bit too selfish.

(And just a little disclaimer–I am choosing not to fall victim to my perpetual problem with “spending shame” today, due to my desire to share my fabulous finds with others.  Therefore, my altruism is overriding my desire to hide my materialistic tendencies, so don’t hate! (-:  I know…I deserve an award or something for being so selfless.)

So, I shall share with you some cool finds I scored today, almost all of which were on sale (hooray!!):

Free People Cashmere Leggings

Need I say more?? I am so amped to wear these, cashmere is my favourite thing ever, ever, ever…and leggings are so comfortable!  In other words I will probably be wearing these a bit too often.

($99.95 down from $128.00 at freepeople.com)

Free People Wishbone Necklace

I thought this was way cool.  I usually wear a few necklaces and this one looks good for layering, not to mention I’m getting more into wearing mutiple kinds of metal (I’m generally not a gold girl) so I thought this was cool.  Plus, it reminds me of pulling on the wishbone at Thanksgiving as a child.  Who doesn’t miss that?!

($49.95 down from $198.00 at freepeople.com)

Anthropologie Suspended Pearl Ring

I think this is so cool.  I’m crazy about pearls and this is a funky/interesting piece that incorporates them.  I’m super into it, and it was also super on sale! Yippee!

($79.95 down from $138.00 at anthropologie.com)

Random Other Stuff From Anthro Which I Cannot Find Photos Of, But Which Are Awesome and I Encourage You To Check Out

(Alternative Heading: Evidence That I Am Old)


Spice Mill$12.95 down from $34.00

Very pretty and also quite reasonably priced!

Giraffe Measuring Spoons$19.95 down from $28.00

These are so effing cute I just could not resist!  Also, I am a pretty big baker but also quite lazy, so I usually refrain from measuring ingredients, which probably isn’t the best idea.  So, I think purchasing measuring spoons is a step in the right direction!

Vine Perfume Bottle$7.95 down from $28.00

I have such a weakness for pretty little things, and probably none more so than perfume bottles.  Anthropologie always has beautiful ones, and I just couldn’t resist this one at such a great price!

Parisian Cafe Apron$32.00

Okay. Make fun of me all you want.  I know this a really suburban move, not to mention the fact that “I’m not old enough to wear an apron” (quotation courtesy of Marley)…but I like it, and I do not like getting flour/sugar/etc. all over myself whilst baking.  So, get over it.  Or, better yet, embrace the uncool.  (This is my general modus operandi in life, fyi!)

Ice Breaker Dress–$119.95 down from $228.00

This is a great brunch dress, or perhaps a party, with the right shoe.  I think it’s really refreshing architecturally, and I like it because it’s fashionable without being overly sexy. I’m a pretty busty chick and sometimes it is difficult for me to find dresses that don’t look too sexy (i.e. show a tacky amount of cleavage) on me, but that are still stylish and not frumpalicious (adj. frumpily delicious–except not).  So this is cool without being too revealing, in my opinion.


Victoria’s Secret Vest

Victoria’s Secret Suit

I actually really like their suits.  I know my mother would gasp at this notion, and some may find the idea tacky, but I say don’t knock it until you try it. Obviously, when it comes to suits, quality is a issue and therefore Victoria’s Secret is probably not the *best* choice…that said, I feel that for my age, some of my nicer suits come on too strong.  These suits actually have a nice silhouette and with the super cheap prices, you can have them custom tailored (and have the buttons changed), which is uber-important and does a lot to increase the quality/look of the suit.  Moreover, I would highly recommend going with the color black, because the fabric quality with these suits isn’t really the best, and I think that is far more noticeable with lighter colors.  All of that said, I really like this suit (I’m very into the slouchy/extra-wide-leg look), and the vest, and am excited it was such a steal!

(Vest-$19.99 [!!] down from $59.50 @ VictoriasSecret.com)

( Blazer–$29.99 down from $178.00, and Pant–$19.99 down from $88.00 [!!]–link here)

Victoria’s Secret is not my favourite lingerie place (I’m totally a trashy lingerie girl) but I did purchase a lot of stuff on sale…because I’m that girl, the one who buys lingerie even though she has no one to wear it for.  Ha!  I need something to force me to keep going to the gym, after all.  However, I am not going to post it on here, because that would be simply indecent!  But here is a link to the lingerie they have on sale–and there’s a lot! (Hint, hint to the men out there–if you are a slacker and have not already purchased something for V-day for your lover!)

Of course I also had to hit up my ultimate weakness, aka American Apparel, but I’m not going to post the stuff because it was sadly not on sale nor exciting! However in the interest of any men out there who may be looking for a Valentine’s Day present still, I will post one of my favourite products of theirs:

They have the BEST thigh-highs ever.  Why?  Because they are socks, not stockings.  Ergo, they are crazy comfortable!!  I wear these all the time because they are super cool ways to stay warm during the winter/in dresses and they are seriously so very comfortable.  However, they also have a second purpose, which is in the bedroom as BC is quite crazy for them–whether or not they are as sexy as true thigh-highs, I do not know, but they are definitely infinitely better in my opinion, because sexy + practical is awesome. :) :) :)  They are $17.00 @ americanapparel.net.

For those not familiar with American Apparel, I am a huge fan of it because although the prices are a bit high, this is for a very good reason–their clothing is American-made and their company has very ethically rigorous policies.  Aside from the fact that I passionately support their ideals, their clothing is also very high quality, in my opinion.  I don’t want to inject any unnecessary seriousness into this delightfully frivolous posting, but it is a really wonderful company and I strongly encourage you to purchase something from them!


Alright this concludes my shopping binge/ADHD coping mechanism, and I hope someone out there enjoys some of the deals I have found today because they got me quite excited.  Just don’t tell anyone–I have a reputation to protect which does not include my materialistic tendencies!  (Hah, that is a joke.  Mostly.)

Writing this post has been a welcome distraction from the piles of work I have neglected this weekend.  :( I am very sad that I now must rouse my brain from its brief holiday!

I will update you on my super fun weekend at a later date! As if you care! Hah…(sorry still a bit loopy from my ‘medication’)

Enjoy what is left of the weekend, people!! :) :) :) :)

xx Charlee

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true story, airport style

Yo friends!

I am presently in one of my least favourite places in the Universe, the airport.  Generally, I am crazy late for domestic flights, and board the plane AFTER boarding has ended and they’ve removed the tunnel, via a scolding flight attendant escort.  To be honest, I’m a little bummed out that I will miss out on the terribly fun stares of my fellow passengers today, but alas, roomie is more responsible than I and has therefore forced my bum to migrate to the airport ridiculously early.

SO here I am, all drugged up with nowhere to go.

Yes it is true my friends, I don’t think I have any other anxiety so strong as that which flying causes within me.  I’m a relatively frequent flier, yet my discomfort with the notion has never quite subsided.  There have been several times when I have actually decided (t minus 30 minutes before takeoff) not to board a plane, leaving me stranded.  After this happened a few times, my doctor decided it would be prudent to drug me during travel.  Hence, I give you “Charlee under the influence of far too many milligrams of benzodiazepine”.

Anyway, as so often happens when I am forced to deal with airports/planes, I have been annoyed by the actions of various people.  Ohkay, SURE, I know I have probably annoyed my fair share of people today also…but that is irrelevant to the fact that the same things bother me every time I travel.  So, I bring you my “rules” for the procedures associated with changes in geographical location:

Number One: Wear Something Comfortable But Not Yucky

This is a very important one my friends.  I am the first to admit that I generally wear things whilst flying that I would never wear in my general life–that is, I dress solely to be comfortable, and therefore look like a crackhead most of the time.

Well, I have a sad tale to explain this life lesson that I had to learn the hard way: I was flying to Pittsburgh last minute to see family, so I didn’t have much time to pack/get my act together and therefore looked like a really unsightly version of myself.  Due to a snowstorm, my flight got canceled and the next one included a detour to DC…well, I got stuck in DC my friends.  I had the option of waiting out the storm/getting a hotel, but I have friends in DC so I figured I’d spend a day or two with them rather than dealing with the masses of angry stranded travelers.  However, this meant I did not have my luggage and I looked like a COMPLETE street rat.  Luckily, my dear friend allowed me to change into some less offensive clothing of hers, but I still had to deal with the trip from Dulles to the city looking like a fool–not to mention showing up to meet my friend and her friends looking as though I’d just rolled out of bed (literally–I was practically wearing pajamas).

So, learn from my mistake friends, even if all you do whilst flying is sleep, it is not wise to dress as though all you plan to do is sleep!

Number Two: Take A Chill Pill (literally or figuratively)

This one actually applies in all situations.  I would like everyone in the world to take a chill pill.

Well, that is a bit untrue as some people I encounter are sufficiently chill, but unfortunately, there seems to be an absence of the chill factor in airports.  To be fair, I realise that airports are an unpleasant place to spend time.  Oh, how I realise this.  I just wish we could all do our part to make it a bit less unpleasant by calming the eff down a little bit.  Just a little bit.

Number Three: Use your brain

Again, I suppose this one could be applied to life also.  However, this is the number one thing that bothers me in airports.

I’m not a mean or unfriendly person, and I know chilling in airports is a bummer, so I am always down to converse with those around me.  I draw the line, however, when someone feels the need to not only carry on a conversation with me for an excessive period of time, even though I’ve made it clear that I am not interested in hearing the details of their sister’s cousin’s wife’s daughter’s bat mitzvah, but also does not properly understand my motives when I state that I need to get a cup of coffee.  No, I don’t want you to join.  I’m trying to get away from you.

Then there are the children.  Oh, the children.  I’m actually a gigantic fan of kids–I’m only half-kidding when I say one of my goals in life is to “save the children” and I’ve done a lot of volunteering with kids and was even a nanny for about a month.  So I’m down with the youngins.  However, I am not down with their parents.  Children should not be running amok through airports–frolicking, playing…fine–but screaming?  This is not okay, and the parents who think it is are clearly not aware of the fact that unpleasant noises are something many of us strive to avoid in life, and the last thing we want is their ignorance forcing this upon us.  When I have children I will obviously be slipping them a few chill pills whilst traveling.

Although it is also possible that I am a bit bitter that I can no longer be the one running around and having fun and that I’m expected to sit here, bored out of my mind, for an extended period of time.

Okay I think that is about it for my rant of the day…please keep my sage advice in mind next time you find yourself traveling, and if you should find yourself sitting next to me on a plane, please be aware of the fact that I am dazed and confused and not exactly down to discuss the purpose of your business trip!  I will appreciate this very, very much!

hugs and kisses, Charlee

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curses!

Ladies and gentlemen of the internet, I feel as though I am cursed!  The recent turn of events in my life has me questioning the possibility of someone performing black magic upon me; I am legitimately half-way serious about this suspicion.

One recent curse is my newfound semi-ambitious attitude, which prompted me to take a job instructing undergraduates–why is this a curse you ask?  Well, I suppose the true curse is my laziness, because I took the job so late that the subjects I would have enjoyed teaching were not available and I am now stuck reciting calculus.  Unfortunately, my dim-witted arse was unable to make the necessary neurological connections to come to the conclusion that I’m not especially qualified for this position because I have not done calculus in quite some time–therefore, the lack of calculus combined with my cannabis-damaged memory has really been cramping my style this week.

So now I have tons of studying to do, as I can hardly even remember how to take the derivative of something.  That’s actually not a joke.  Sad, right? (I know there are some math geeks out there!)

Not to mention I made the poor choice of going out tonight instead of getting work done, I have to work tomorrow, and perhaps most foreboding–I must rise at 8 am.  Clearly this is the result of witchcraft.

Also, to update you on my misadventures: I texted Mr. Martini to say I wasn’t sure what I wanted from him.  Straightforward and honest is always the way to go, right?  Wrong.  He sent me a text that said: “Well let me know when you figure it out.”  Psh!! Perhaps he didn’t intend for that to come off with an air of attitude, but it did, and I’m bothered by it because Mr. Martini is usually very chill, unlike the excessively moody men I’ve had the misfortune of spending time with in the past–and I am not into it.  At all.

Things have been weird with BC as well, and I feel as though I might be in a bit over my head.  We’ve been spending quite a bit of time together and talking a lot–which is cool, because he’s a friend and I know he’s going through a hard time, and I did sort of miss him.  But, the other aspect of the equation is that we’re sleeping together and that means lots of sleepovers and snuggling and couple-y things, which I’m not altogether comfortable with.  One of my friends told me my “radar of commitment-phobia” is unnecessarily going off, and I think he was right–I have no reason to be getting stressed out over this because we’re just hanging out and having fun (even if that entails breaking the booty call code).  Right?  Right.

This is simply further evidence of the dark-sided stuff going on in my life!  (major love to you if you know what that phrase is a reference to)

Furthermore, insomnia has continued to be an intense issue for me.  Needless to say, this is very unhealthy and worrisome!  And also further evidence of my thesis.

Curses!  I am cursed.

xx Charlee

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friday fun :)

From Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs by Chuck Klosterman:

“You can’t really learn much about a person based upon what kind of music they happen to like.  As a personality test, it doesn’t work even half the time.  However, there is at least one thing you can learn: The most wretched people in the world are those who tell you they like every kind of music ‘except country.’  People who say that are boorish and pretentious at the same time.  All it means is that they’ve managed to figure out the most rudimentary rule of pop sociology; they know that hipsters gauge the coolness of others by their espoused taste in sound, and they know that hipsters hate modern country music.  And they hate it because it speaks to normal people in a tangible, rational manner.  Hipsters hate it because they hate Midwesterners, and they hate Southerners, and they hate people with real jobs.”

Hope everyone has a great friday!

xx Charlee

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Saturday night, we look alright, we’re going out…boring

Blah…it’s approximately 1 am on a Saturday night, and one would think any 22 year old would be out partying–I, however, was not really having a good time and have to work tomorrow, and therefore decided to cut the night short and head home to my book (yes I am quite a closet nerd).  Sometimes the whole party scene really gets old–haha, or perhaps I’m just getting old!

In any case, music is one of my favourite things so I’m going to occasionally share music I’m into at the moment on here.  The song I’m listening to right now really fits my current mood, so, enjoy The Pierces’ song “Boring”!

I have to admit that I didn’t really “get” them at first, but after listening to “Boring” on repeat, I have to say that my love for them has grown immensely.  They have a very subtly tongue-in-cheek way about them, but they’re also sexy as hell in a very nihilistic way.  I also think it’s amazing that they are so unique–I can honestly say that I haven’t seen a similar group–and I’m super into the retro thing going on with female vocalists right now, however, I must admit it is not entirely original to The Pierces as I believe several artists have emerged whom one could call Winehouse-esque.

Anyway–that’s all for tonight.  I have to rest up for yet another incredibly rewarding day of making lattés. :)  Hope you enjoy the song!

xx Charlee

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